Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I am often questioned on what exactly Tasha does to push my buttons each and every day. It doesn't take much, maybe I'm just a push-over in the respect that she can push-me-over the edge quite quickly. To understand the full impact of a Tasha filled day you must spend one with her, but here is just what happened in the last 45 minutes...

Lunch. Can be a drama, can be easy, can be eaten, can not be eaten. I can give her choices, I can tell her what's to eat, she can tell me what to eat. Maybe consistency is the problem, but I don't think so. Too much consistency means I'm bossing her around, just ask her. She's calling me from the other room (rude I know, but I just can't battle that right now). Turns out she wasn't calling me, she was yelling at Dora on the TV. We laughed about it and I told her I was going to go to the bathroom and then make some lunch. "That will be taking too long!" she wails. "I want something now like some cheese." Such is life and I go to the bathroom. In the kitchen, I'm mixing the tuna and pulling out the cheese. Miss Impatient storms in and gets out the other cheese and the following event happens.

She is going to spend time this evening with Maggie and Kyra, out, in public, possibly watching a movie. In order for this to happen successfully, and since it will be a late night, Tasha needs to take a nap. I explain this to her and she's excited to see Maggie. Oh joy. BUT, as I remind her that at 1 o'clock we will be laying down for a nap she gives me the look. I say, "are you going to cooperate nicely, or not?" She says she's not. I figure the question was confusing and rephrase it, to which she replies, "I'm not going to cooperate." She's serious and in 10 minutes things are going to become very difficult around here.

Meanwhile, she's eaten her lunch, come back for more, opened her own bag of Annie's bunny crackers, even though I offered her some goldfish, and probably gotten cracker crumbs all over our bed. That's OK though because she usually eats on Bill's side of the bed :) This is his penance for getting to go off to work all day and leaving me with the chaos of children, school, and food. I really am jealous because none of this would have happened had I not being trying to cram in a little work before Tasha came home. I don't have scheduled work hours so I have to fit it in when possible, sometimes that happens as the bus is pulling in and I need to finish, therefore the child runs freely through the house tormenting the dogs and turning on the TV. Do I sound overwhelmed? Well guess what? I'm not! If I was I totally couldn't be writing this down, I'd be in hiding like I was last week. Right now I'm just fearful. Fearful of my 4 year old who is going to scream at me in 3 minutes because she doesn't want to take a nap.


Bridget said...

Sounds like a 4 year old thing. Savannah comes home from school and demands a snack to which I say wait and she screams at me. "You're taking too long!" Then later when she seems overwhelmed I tell her to lay down and again she screams at me. "No, I hate you!" So I put her in her room and say stay here until you calm down. and I get back "You're stupid mommy! I hate you, fooorrreeeverrr!!!"
This is all in about 30 minutes too.
I think its just the age.

Crystal said...

I don't ask what she does anymore because now that I know you both better I can see how she pushes your buttons and it totally reminds me of Derek and myself. Similar dynamics except Tasha's probably a little more intense.

H said...

Oh Bridget, I'm sorry you're hated too. That's just started here and turned into a "bad word".

Crystal, maybe I'm the one that is more intense. Who knows?! I feel really bad for Kyra when Tasha is purposefully irritating her though.

April said...

More advice (unsolicited I know): Read Becky Bailey's Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline. I was having very similar problens with Justin. He was irritating me all day, every day and I was flipping out. We were constantly screaming at each other. Anyway, once I read her book and saw clearly what I was doing to intensify the problem; I was able to make changes that helped him make changes. Jenny says I'm not scray enough. Frankly I don't want to scare my children into obedience. I'd just like to behave in a way that will make them more likely to behave too. It's really a two way street. It sucks. I know. But, it can get better. Good luck!