Dumbing Down

I recently read an article on how, as a society, we are dumbing down. It wasn't particularly well written, in fact, most of the examples this woman gave were pretty lame. Her point was that advertising and product labeling has come to an all time low. To write on a coffee cup, "caution: contents may be hot" seems a little stupid. The point is, if they don't give you the warning, you can sue the people that served you the coffee and/or the makers of the coffee cup. Ridiculous. So, as a result of the sue-crazed public, manufacturers are now having to label their products with the most redundant information and they have to give specific instructions on even the simplest of all devices. For instance, do you really need to explain how to put up a hair dryer so someone doesn't inadvertently step into the shower with the water running to unplug the little booger. Personally, I remember being fairly young when I found the first instruction on the microwave popcorn bag hilarious. It read, "remove bag from outer plastic and unfold." Not funny in itself until you realize that I had to do all that in order to read the instructions.

I've been feeling pretty dumb lately while reading other people's writing. Heck, I know I can't keep up with the Wall Street Journal, but these are people I know writing this stuff. (see that technical word, "stuff") I couldn't use the word "musing" or "diverge" in a real sentence. I had a hard time coming up with a sentence for "render" other than "The wrestler rendered his opponent helpless." Pathetic I tell you, pa-the-tic!

What do I plan to do about this? I've been looking up words. I'm going to get word-of-the-day toilet paper. (Oh, just kidding there Friends fans) I actually paid close attention to what I was reading one night. I have always been fascinated by JK Rowling's ability to write complex sentences and use a mix of English, muggle, and wizarding words. So, in Chapter 13 of "The Half-Blood Prince" I wrote every word that I don't hear in everyday speech. Here's the list:

Words I might have used and could define in essay format: feigning, impertinent, inadvertently, squarely, notorious, intrigued, deluded, irksome, unnerved
Words I probably have never used but could pick out of a multiple choice quiz: astute, incensed, indignantly, unrequited, famed, inquisitorial (glance), admonitions, cache, ominously, enigmatic
Words I have never seen before, wish that JK made up, but could figure out their meaning through context: quellingly, swilled, bestial, magpie-like tendency.

There you have it folks. That's what a college degree will get you. But remember, I'm not as think as you dumb I am. And, since I don't hear it in everyday speech, that says something about the people I converse with, doesn't it? Hopefully they're not dumbing down for my sake!